 |
| Author | Post |
|---|
Garden Queen
Honored Fellow Grover
| Joined: | Wed Apr 16th, 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 505 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: |  |
|
Posted: Fri Mar 20th, 2009 10:15 pm |
|
See how many you think certain people in government or your work or family etc.
that can fit some of these.
Narcissism Symptoms Checklist
How to Spot An Emotional Vampire
THE SMARTEST, MOST TALENTED, ALL-AROUND BEST PERSON IN THE WORLD TEST:
True or false? Score one point for each true answer.
1. THIS PERSON HAS ACHIEVED MORE THAN MOST PEOPLE HIS OR HER AGE.
2. THIS PERSON IS FIRMLY CONVINCED THAT HE OR SHE IS BETTER, SMARTER, OR MORE TALENTED THAN OTHER PEOPLE.
3. THIS PERSON LOVES COMPETITION, BUT IS A POOR LOSER.
4. THIS PERSON HAS FANTASIES OF DOING SOMETHING GREAT OR BE
ING FAMOUS, AND OFTEN EXPECTS TO BE TREATED AS IF THESE FANTASIES HAD ALREADY COME TRUE.
5. THIS PERSON HAS VERY LITTLE INTEREST IN WHAT OTHER PEOPLE ARE THINKING OR FEELING, UNLESS HE OR SHE WANTS SOMETHING FROM THEM.
6. THIS PERSON IS A NAME DROPPER.
7. TO THIS PERSON IT IS VERY IMPORTANT TO LIVE IN THE RIGHT PLACE AND ASSOCIATE WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE.
8. THIS PERSON TAKES ADVANTAGE OF OTHER PEOPLE TO ACHIEVE HIS OR HER OWN GOALS
.
9. THIS PERSON USUALLY MANAGES TO BE IN A CATEGORY BY HIM OR HERSELF.
10. THIS PERSON OFTEN FEELS PUT UPON WHEN ASKED TO TAKE CARE OF HIS OR HER RESPONSIBILITIES TO FAMILY, FRIENDS, OR WORK GROUP.
11. THIS PERSON REGULARLY DISREGARDS RULES OR EXPECTS THEM TO BE CHANGED BECAUSE HE OR SHE IS IN SOME WAY SPECIAL.
12. THIS PERSON BECOMES IRRITATED WHEN OTHER PEOPLE DON'T AUTOMATICALLY DO WHAT HE OR SHE WANTS THEM TO DO, EVEN WHEN THEY HAVE A GOOD REASON FOR NOT COMPLYING.
13. THIS PERSON REVIEWS SPORTS, ART, AND LITERATURE BY TELLING YOU WHAT HE OR SHE WOULD HAVE DONE INSTEAD.
14. THIS PERSON THINKS MOST CRITICISMS OF HIM OR HER ARE MOTIVATED BY JEALOUSY.
15. THIS PERSON REGARDS ANYTHING SHORT OF WORSHIP TO BE REJECTION.
16. THIS PERSON SUFFERS FROM A CONGENITAL INABILITY TO RECOGNIZE HIS OR HER OWN MISTAKES. ON THE RARE OCCASIONS THAT THIS PERSON DOES RECOGNIZE A MISTAKE, EVEN THE SLIGHTEST ERROR CAN PRECIPITATE A MAJOR DEPRESSION.
17. THIS PERSON OFTEN EXPLAINS WHY PEOPLE WHO ARE BETTER KNOWN THAN HE OR SHE IS NOT REALLY ALL THAT GREAT.
18. THIS PERSON OFTEN COMPLAINS OF BEING MISTREATED OR MISUNDERSTOOD.
19. PEOPLE EITHER LOVE OR HATE THIS PERSON.
20. DESPITE THIS PERSON'S OVERLY HIGH OPINION OF HIM OR HERSELF, HE OR SHE IS REALLY QUITE INTELLIGENT AND TALENTED.
Scoring: Five or more true answers qualifies the person as a Narcissistic Emotional Vampire, though not necessarily for a diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality. If the person scores higher than ten, and is not a member of the royal family, be careful that you aren't mistaken for one of the servants.
By ALBERT J. BERNSTEIN, Ph.D.
The DSM-IV Diagnostic Criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder are: (don't try this at home, folks):
A pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, lack of empathy, as indicated by at least five of the following:
1. a grandiose sense of self-importance
2. is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
3. believes that he or she is "special" and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
4. requires excessive admiration
5. has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favourable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations
6. is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
7. lacks empathy and is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
8. is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her
9. shows arrogant, haughty behaviours or attitudes
In my opinion, the DSM IV criteria (listed at the bottom) for Narcissistic Personality Disorder do not really help the average person. Sometimes people have narcissistic traits that overwhelm us, and we feel drained by their behaviour. When an aura of confusion surrounds an encounter with someone grossly narcissistic, it helps us to recognise this red flag, and to take measures to deal with that person. Narcissistic Personality Disorder does not run rampant in our population, but dealing with narcissistic people may be a challenge for many of us across our respective lifetimes.
Even though I have a Master's in psychology, it did not help me identify and deal with people who are severely narcissistic. The cues, the verbal abuse and emotional abuse, and the manipulation, can be subtle and insidious; our sense of self erodes over time as the narcissist slowly undermines us.
Albert Bernstein's book, (see website: Emotional Vampires) has helped me immensely to see narcissistic people for what they are and how to cope with that knowledge, and them. And it has also helped me to recognise that there may be hope for them as well as those of us dealing with them. Even if it means letting go of someone beloved, because they are not self-aware, and because to remain means we progress in feeling astoundingly diminished and damaged and small till nothing seems left of us. ~Invicta, 08/20/03
Last edited on Fri Mar 20th, 2009 10:18 pm by Garden Queen
|
*Phil*
Opinionated Interventionist
| Joined: | Thu Apr 21st, 2005 |
| Location: | North Carolina USA |
| Posts: | 3490 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: |   |
|
Posted: Sat Mar 21st, 2009 01:06 pm |
|
Sounds like the Elites that run and manipulate this country. Here is an interesting and relevant book, I haven't read it yet but it is on my list of books to read:
The Revolt of the Elites: And the Betrayal of Democracy by Christopher Lasch
From the Publisher: [Lasch] argues that democracy today is threatened not by the masses, as Jose Ortega y Gasset (The Revolt of the Masses) had said, but by the elites. These elites - mobile and increasingly global in outlook - refuse to accept limits or ties to nation and place. Lasch contends that, as they isolate themselves in their networks and enclaves, they abandon the middle class, divide the nation, and betray the idea of a democracy for all America's citizens. The book is historical writing at its best, using the past to reveal the roots of our current dilemma. The author traces how meritocracy - selective elevation into the elite - gradually replaced the original American democratic ideal of competence and respect for every man. Among other cultural trends, he trenchantly criticizes the vogue for self-esteem over achievement as a false remedy for deeper social problems, and attacks the superior pseudoradicalism of the academic left. Brilliantly he reveals why it is no wonder that Americans are apathetic about their common culture and see no point in arguing politics or voting. In a powerful final section Lasch traces the spiritual crisis of democracy. The elites, having jettisoned the moral and ethical guidelines provided by religion, cling to the belief that through science they can master their fates and escape mortal limits. In pursuit of this illusion they have become infatuated with the global economy. Their revolt, the author warns, is diminishing what is worthwhile about American life. This volume, completed just before the author's death, continues in his tradition of vigorous and original thought and should stir soul-searching among readers concerned about the future of America and its democracy.
____________________
Pecca fortiter, sed fortius fide et gaude in Christo!
Galactic Signature: Blue Self-Existing Monkey
|
Garden Queen
Honored Fellow Grover
| Joined: | Wed Apr 16th, 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 505 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Mar 22nd, 2009 01:20 am |
|
Thanks Phil!!!
Christopher Lasch is quite an author! I have his book on the Culture of Narcissism
I read many years ago.
I found this quote on a website about him with a list of his books.
..."individuals cannot learn to speak for themselves at all, much less come to an intelligent understanding of their happiness and wellbeing, in a world in which there are no values except those of the market. . . . the market tends to universalize itself. It does not easily coexist with institutions that operate according to principles that are antithetical to itself: schools and universities, newspapers and magazines, charities, families. Sooner or later the market tends to absorb them all. It puts an almost irresistable presure on every activity to justify itself in the only terms it recognizes: to become a business proposition, to pay its own way, to show black ink on the bottom line. It turns news into entertainment, scholarship into professional careerism, social work into the scientific management of poverty. Inexorably it remodels every institution in its own image."
Revolt of the Elites
Revolt of the Last edited on Sun Mar 22nd, 2009 01:26 am by Garden Queen
|
*Phil*
Opinionated Interventionist
| Joined: | Thu Apr 21st, 2005 |
| Location: | North Carolina USA |
| Posts: | 3490 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Tue Mar 24th, 2009 01:58 pm |
|
Type A personality narcissists can make life really rough for everyone. When they get to the top like at the money houses of JPMorgan, Goldman Sachs, US Secretary of the Treasury, Advisors to the President, the whole nation get screwed.
Revolt of the Elites probably has quite a few John Galt's who are not Type A narcissists. 80 hour work weeks for $200,000 a year is a much poorer life than an 8 hour work week for $30,000 a year. So, understandably, many look for an exit. The secret term in this market value equation is quality of life now and not the mythical gold watch at retirement. This is what the elites in leadership do not what us to know. They will always offer a little money and then devalue our lives with 80 hour work weeks. If we come up with techniques for doing our work in 1/4 the time and then spend the rest of the time gardening or playing golf we would get fired! Instead they demand we then do 4 times the amount of work. Our productivity improvements are stolen by the elites. Every year the government measures aggregate productivity gains of the population yet real wages have actually been declining - this money goes to government and the elites. Since the government shares in the stolen labor they do everything possible to encourage the piracy and promote an ideology that keeps the workers in the dark about it.
____________________
Pecca fortiter, sed fortius fide et gaude in Christo!
Galactic Signature: Blue Self-Existing Monkey
|
Garden Queen
Honored Fellow Grover
| Joined: | Wed Apr 16th, 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 505 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Tue Mar 24th, 2009 03:42 pm |
|
Phil!
You need to write a book...a few books..with your understanding of the two
biggies..psychology/economy...! Thanks. The new gospel...the wedding
of psyche with economy.
|
*Phil*
Opinionated Interventionist
| Joined: | Thu Apr 21st, 2005 |
| Location: | North Carolina USA |
| Posts: | 3490 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Wed Mar 25th, 2009 09:48 pm |
|
You are too generous. It was your post that stimulated the lines of thought about what I've been reading and thinking about. Write a book? LOL
There was a synchronicity a couple of days ago. I wanted to start a quick marketing experiment on eBay to test an idea. To do that I needed a user Id and "happy go lucky" popped into mind for no particular reason so I registered the closest to it that wasn't already chosen. I got the experiment set up and it is running. After setting up the experiment I went to the book store to to scan what is new and creative, as soon as I went to the magazine rack the first magazine cover I looked at had "Happy Go Lucky" written on it. So reading the article, it was in interview with the lead actress Sally Hawkins of a movie with the name Happy Go Lucky, she said, "I don’t know what I’m doing, I don’t know where I will end up, what I’m playing, what film we’re making, or if I will end up on the cutting-room floor at the end of it. It is an act of faith." 
That is where I am at right now.
____________________
Pecca fortiter, sed fortius fide et gaude in Christo!
Galactic Signature: Blue Self-Existing Monkey
|
Current time is 01:26 am | |
|
|
|
|
